babies,

duggar family aint got shit on me. can you say SINGLE-PARENT-HOME BEEEOOOOOTCH

nettie moore

lordy lord. i think i'd probably be locked up right now if it weren't for the gym. as boring as it can be, i have access to 4 within walking distance from the house. most near harvard square. havn't gotten too into the swimming though. that used to be a daily thing for me, just dont seem fun no more... lot of time on the bike, trying to strengthen right knee with some light weights. i took katt williams' advice and listened to lil jon while on the bike. fun. got some new pearlizumi knee warmers. i look like a right idiot walking around the house in cut-off jeans and those stickin out. dressed 4 success.

if i gained nothing else from my time spent in new england, at least i met john malkovich. and he thinks this is an awful town too. driving to graceland in a week. gran has me committed to 2 days of cooking at her house. she's gonna put 5 pounds on me over the holiday. bringing back 2 iron skillets, skateboard, waders. hope to catch up with some old buds. its the last time i'll see that town, prolly till next xmas. can't say i'm too depressed about that....

if i were drivin down solo i'd stop in wv and see if i could talk sue haywood into hangin out for a drink. lookin forward to checkin out the offroad to athens dvd. yummy

honduras

looking down on copan, honduras






















freddy







































near the town of tela

ellen willis, 1941-2006

SUPERSENSITIVE: in the habit of hearing insult and bigotry where none is intended; Jews are traditionally the worst offenders, being inclined to take constructive criticism like "Pale-faced Jew-boy, I wish you were dead" as evidence of anti-Semitism.
-ellen willis

holy chro-moly!!

had a date a few nights ago. the first since last summer. thought i'd make an effort, put myself out there... i'm really not a good sport. or maybe i just don't like the sport of dating. i'm not a recreation-oriented person. i don't want a good-time buddy. i want a real partner. i want someone to read to me. draw me corny pictures. save newspaper articles for me to read. buy me an eclair or a bavarian cream. a best friend. i want a copy of myself!!! yes its narcissistic. at least i'll own it.

so after being in this town since july, i actually asked someone out. i got lured into the excitement of a real date. hung out twice, then immediately got sideclocked in an email!! well i tried.

i saw the fountain last night at the theater. if a movie can save your life, this is the one. after getting dumped by someone i had never even kissed, i was feeling a bit fragile. i got teary a couple times on the drive over, the early night was coming on fast. i knew i needed to hit the seat and get distracted before i lost the ability to walk through a crowd without tears streaming down my paling new england face.

hugh jackman couldn't have been a better pick. well, maybe i should say nobody could have played this role better. and no computer imagery to enhance the visuals. all organic. so glad i caught this one on the big screen.

colurango

can't wait to get back to my
chinatown campspot. las animas!!
seven months...












met up with kage at the b-side in somerville last night.
excellent time. a little weary of her psych degree
"why do you think that is?" questions...













"the longest train i ever saw went down that georgia line. the engine passed at six o'clock and the cab passed by at nine."

monkey off my back

and it feels good. fresh start.
xmas xmas xmas
yummy walks, seeing all the lights.

2nite will be fun. anticipation is killing me...

oh, beautiful new england.

mount chocorua.

i was actually pleasantly surprised at how nice it was.












arrived too late to make it all the way up the 1st day. stayed just off the trail, hadn't seen stars that bright since being out west. blinking and winking through the trees at me. dark at 4:30...












talked to a couple old friends recently. since i've been here, i've had nothing to offer - like i'm just on hold.

i feel bad about talking to people from my past because i don't know what to say. all i can do is ask questions. there's really nothing to tell.... there is nobody in my life that i'm close to, i have no overwhelming or exciting experiences. i know, snap out of it....

nice line from built to spill's latest: "when things are all you think of, and plans are all you make, and thoughts are all you dream of, and falls are all you take - look out the world's destroying you. relax it isn't fair. mother nature's disposition, she don't mind, she don't care."

new fun!!!!

msr miniworks water filter
marmot 'never winter' 30 degree down bag
or snowline mitts
sierra designs portable attic for sirius tent
msr 4l dromlite bag

the water filter is super-easy to use & maintain. no tools required. i was relieved to get to the end of the instruction manual in only 6 tiny pages! it works really fast too. screwed it onto a nalgene, had it full in less than a minute. tested the new bag 2 nights ago when the low was 31. maybe if i hadn't been on a second-story porch it would have been nicer but my face was really cold all night. the rest of me was warm inside the bag but i came back inside at 2am. i'd say the bag was perfect. weighs under 2 lbs, compresses to probably half the size of my winter bag and is gonna be a good friend in the desert....
this weekend i'm going up to the whites. the ringer. probably solo unless j wants to go too. won't be taking the new bag! hopefully i'll get snowed on. yesiree.


"Too bad they don’t know that the struggle of the twenty-first century started here, a tiny creek in Death Valley." - erik gauger on pupfish in death valley

ny

met a girl who trains monkeys for paralyzed people. once the monkeys are trained, they help out their new owners with simple tasks- turning a page in a book, getting them water, etc... its a local non-profit organization downtown. i want to work there really bad.
spent the weekend in ny and jersey with the fam. 2 grandmas, 4 moms, 5 cousins, 6 sisters, 8 daughters.
saw saturday night live in ny. fun. there was a monkey hanging out down on the set before borat opened. it would take it's hat off, put it back on, look around, and do it again. i imagine that anybody who really thought about it would agree that yes, they would like to have their own personal monkey. what better present could there be? mine would be named lucy. lucy goosy.

(colossus of roads)

saw this at the coolidge corner theater couple hours ago. 16 years in the making. lucky me! best $7.50 date i ever took myself on.

seldom seen

seems like forever since i've been out of this house. its got the feel of our youth in it lately. spending so much time with melissa, emily. a treasure i'll have forever. growing up, it was just us 3- mom her and i. something warming about the combination.

rain.

sweetest holly! (want to see you again soon)
how funny. 1993 was the last time i'd seen or talked to her. same sweet girl. whoa!!!
the walls we build inside us and around us over time...
can't wait for xmas. see all the family. there will be a ton of kids this year. last year was the first year i wasn't in mtown for xmas. i want xmas music all the way home. cheese!!


need to get on the selling train and lighten the load a little more. had a throw-out party last weekend. felt good. the new built to spill album is solid. 'you in reverse'. guitar aint kiddin. watched the townes van zandt documentary again today. his melancholy reminds me of grandaddy. the few songs i remember of his were the same brand of heartache.

it was cold. i waited. i got drunk. i wrote it all down. i saw the lights of the city start to twinkle. coyotes howled from across the canyon. the wind stopped hours ago. i woke up and made coffee. i walked back down again. how many times can i want the same thing? i find it wherever i go.

she aint revved till the rods are thrown

somethin in the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit bout to be thrown....

weekend need-to-do's....
movie? riiiiiiide. vacuum. wine. kale & beets at sto. eggs. oj.

drinky time.
cein watson
cein's work needs to be looked at in more detail. good stuff.

weekly standard, the perpetual adolescent

ahaaaaaaa just read buckner's blog entries. fucking hilarious. cracker seed in montana, feeling like a cockroach trapped in someone's hand in boston...

"Got up early to get my broken window replaced in Albany before leaving for Boston and an incoming storm.

And Boston...Take a map, rip it up, throw it into the air: where it lands is the street layout of a town that overturns cars whether or not their team wins or loses. Sprinkle with scraps of LL Bean khakis and blue button-ups. Played a small stage in a club steeped in folk traditionalism: i.e., loops and e-bows need not apply. Driving out of Boston, you feel like a cockroach trapped between someone’s giant hands, and every turn you make, the hands move and you’re lost again. You just wanna turn over on your shell and kick your legs up into the clammy air."

yeah the road life. need to make a list of good road movies.
here's one of my favorites













can't wait to see penn's version of into the wild


why i eyes ya.
chilly fingers.

home

surfin the web, i think i found a place where i could spend a lot of time, if not the rest of it. and i'd only be 2.5 hours by automobile from friends. nice.
why do the hutterites always like the cold environs? fucking germans. why do i stay up so late? i should change my name back to it's correct german spelling...
fucking americans.

ok, so i'm going into hibernation soon. hunkering down for the nasty new england winter. approaching fast. finally got the tent dried out from the ny rain. why the hell would anyone in their right mind want to live in this part of the country? "oh but there's so much CULTURE!!!!! there's so much to DO, so much HISTORY!!" wow. i forgot. how could i FORGET??!!!

no use